Running

Day 20: I Ran

Yeah I ran. I’ve run before but this felt different. I thought I was as out of shape as I was a year and a half ago, but the running I did tonight felt easy. Granted, I didn’t do a lot of it. I also didn’t plan or push myself. As soon as it started feeling hard, I’d go back to walking. I’m so afraid of injuring myself.

I can seem to get to sleep tho. I keep getting chest pains from anxiety when I put my phone down because that’s when There’s nothing left to do but think.

I think about a bunch of stuff I rather I didn’t. Then I get the pans of anxiety which I feel in my chest. It hurts which feeds into itself. Not a lot I can do about that except pick my phone back up.

Running

Day 1: Up at 3:30am and feeling like absolute Shit

I’m not in a good headspace today. Haven’t been for two days. I’m feeling hot, sweaty, and my stomach feels sour. It has been for two days now. It’s too early to get my son up for the first day of second grade, but I can’t go back to sleep either. I feel like I haven’t slept enough. I basically just don’t feel right.

But I decided today is going to be day 1 for me anyway. I’ve been putting it off long enough. I need to start training. And today is it.

Training for what? Let’s not say the Los Angeles marathon. Let’s just say running. It’s too early to admit I’m fucking crazy.